


Answered Yearning

by Straya



Category: Tales of Zestiria
Genre: Bathing/Washing, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Angst, Rose unblocking her own resonance before meeting Sorey, Sharing a Bed, Sparrowfeather OC, Touch-Starved Dezel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:55:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24788851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Straya/pseuds/Straya
Summary: After a fight with a hellion, Dezel is in need of some tender loving care. The problem is convincing him that he needs help, but of course Rose is more than up to the challenge!
Relationships: Dezel/Rose (Tales of Zestiria)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 11





	Answered Yearning

Rose was in a hurry. She didn't have time to waste as she helped Eguille and the others get the wagons registered at the stables and the horses unhitched. Her orders to the Ayn siblings to double-check inventory were quicker and harsher than she meant to deliver them, but she needed to get back to Marlind's main gates where they entered just a short while earlier.

The Sparrowfeathers were family; they didn't leave anyone behind if it could be helped, not even their dead. And yet...one had been left behind.

They had been traveling toward Marlind through Falkewin Hillside when what appeared to be a giant bird of prey easily the size of a horse had attacked the caravan. Or that's what Rose herself had seen, anyway. What the others saw with their lack of resonance, she couldn't be sure. Either way, the hellion had gotten its talons into the canvas over the last wagon, ripping it clear with an unearthly shriek. Chaos ensued from there, a few of the crates falling from the wagon along with one of the two Sparrowfeathers who had been riding the wagon bench. Amidst the sound of shattering wood, scattering merchandise, and the shrieks of a terrified pair of horses, Rose had heard the cries for help and jumped from the lead wagon to run back toward her fallen comrade.

She had never made it, however, not with her guardian seraph sweeping her off her feet and forcing her into the back of a different wagon.

“Keep going and don't look back!” he'd ordered her. “I'll deal with the hellion!”

“But Cale–!” she'd protested, fearful for the one who'd fallen from the wagon.

“I'll get him, just go!”

Then Dezel was gone, vanished into the air currents to ride the wind back the way they'd come.

It had only taken a few moments for Cale to somehow magically reappear in the wagon alongside Rose, roughly deposited there by a sentient gust of wind. Behind them, further back beyond the last wagon as it struggled to even out and keep pace with the others, Rose had been able to see the hellion diving to engage someone on the ground. Then, they had rounded a corner on the old dirt road and the screams of the angry hellion became mere echoes as they left both it and Dezel behind.

Rose ran back to the gates, half-cursing herself for listening to her overprotective guardian and half for thinking that actually going back out that way would somehow make a difference. Yet what else could she do? Sit at the inn on her ass and wait for Dezel to come back? What if he didn't catch up? How would Rose and the others locate him if she was the only one who could perceive him? Or what if he'd been eaten?

A couple of months prior, Rose wouldn't have thought herself capable of worrying so much about the seraph who had been residing within her body without permission. Their relationship had gotten off to a rocky start to say the least, once she realized Dezel was hanging around. Even all the uncomfortable vessel and body-borrowing weirdness aside, it had been tough to accept that someone had been shadowing her and her family for years without them knowing it. Creepy, even. Still, Rose had slowly gotten used to him and seen that he was useful to the group, despite being difficult to speak with at times. Brooding and blunt, Dezel was a far throw from a social individual; he only seemed to really speak when it was necessary.

Though for as little as he spoke, Rose realized that if something had happened to him, she would miss the sound of his voice. Even if it was to chide her for improper table manners.

Rose skidded to a halt as she made it past the gates, glancing around hopefully. Ears straining, she listened hard for the sound of footfalls or the distant screeching of hellions. The wooded area around her seemed unusually still, all the birds and insects silent as though waiting for someone or something to speak.

“Dezel...?” she finally called with some hesitation. When there was no answer, she raised her voice, directing it out and down the road. “ _Dezel!_ ”

A sudden strong gust of wind struck her, enough to knock her back a bit. Rose stagger-stepped a moment to keep her balance, then winced as she felt something connect with and seep into her.

 _'...the hell are you doing?'_ a familiar voice asked from inside her head. _'You can't just call for me like that... People will hear.'_

“The hell I can't!” Rose shot back as realization sank in. Her guardian was back, having immediately slid inside his vessel without re-manifesting out of the wind. “And what were you thinking, forcing us to go on without you? Are you hurt?”

 _'I'm fine...'_ His voice was strained.

“You don't sound fine!”

_'Just go back to the inn, Rose. I just need some time to rest.'_

“Bastard...”

Grumbling under her breath, Rose turned on her heel and headed back to the inn. She made another stop back at the stables to be sure everything was under control, then met up with Eguille, Talfryn, and Felice to discuss what had been lost during the attack on the road. Fortunately, it hadn't been crates filled with their more expensive wares, but it still constituted the loss of several thousand gald. As for Cale, he was somewhat scraped and bruised up but thankfully hadn't received much more than that. Rose checked in on him as well, making sure he got his hands on a few gels and that someone was seeing to his medical needs. The others were ordered to tend to their own needs and take the night off otherwise. They'd have to assess how to make up for their losses in the morning.

Rose ordered dinner brought to her inn room and ate in silence, all too aware the entire time that there was no internal voice critiquing her table manners. Finally, as she took her last bite of food and set her fork down, she decided she couldn't take the quiet any longer.

“Hey, are you alright in there?” The question came out around her last mouthful of food.

 _'No, because I'm trying to rest and you're bothering me,'_ came the tired, sullen response.

“Sorry, but I'm used to checking on everyone in person when something like this happens, you know, and I haven't actually _seen_ you since you went to fight that...thing on the road.”

_'You don't need to see me. Just stop bothering me. I'm tired.'_

“At least get out here and take an apple gel or something,” Rose shot back as she stood up from her chair, one hand coming to rest on her hip as she tried to put on an air of intimidation. “Why are you being so stubborn?”

_'Just leave me alone.'_

“Dezel!”

Silence. Rose's frown deepened. So that's the way the bastard wanted to play it, huh? Well, fine. Except she'd learned a little while back that she could oust him with enough will power if he wasn't prepared to deal with the resistance.

“You've got until the count of three to get out here,” she said aloud, “Or I'll dump you out on your ass!”

A bare hint of grumbling followed, but little else.

“One...”

_'Just let me sleep!'_

“Two...”

_'There isn't much you can do to help anyway!'_

“Three!”

_'Dammit, Rose!'_

Before she could throw all her effort into tossing Dezel out, the wind seraph re-manifested on his own...but nearly fell over even as he did so. As he struggled to stay upright, Rose rushed forward and caught him, one arm behind his waist and her other hand on his chest to help hold him up. He trembled in her grip, teeth gritted, then tried to push her away.

“What is with you and this refusal to accept help?” Rose demanded, unwilling to let him go for fear he might collapse completely. “Look at you! You need a couple of gels at the very least!”

“That isn't how this is supposed to work!” He tried to push her back again, but his efforts were weak. “I have to be self-sufficient!”

“Why? Because that's how it was before I could perceive you? Because that's how it had to be after Lafarga–”

“ _Don't say it!_ ” Dezel snarled. “And yes! And because I'm your guardian, not the other way around!”

“Don't be so childish! You're a part of this family and this family takes care of itself! We look out for each other and that includes _you!_ ”

Dezel's feeble struggles ceased. Turning his head away from her, he huffed out a sigh. “Tch, I never asked you or anyone else about being here. I made the choice for everyone. For you. Does that even count?”

Rose pursed her lips, then began helping Dezel over to a nearby chair so he could sit down. “Maybe I didn't think so initially, but I do think so now. You've always put all of us ahead of yourself, especially me. Now sit down already, you're kind of heavy and we should get your boots off.”

“Have I?” Dezel managed before he took a seat, grunting as he did so. From the sound of it, he was harboring injuries beneath his dust-flecked clothing. “You know what I've been doing aside from protecting you and everyone else.”

Rose's frown deepened as she knelt down to pull his boots off. “We've discussed that already. And I told you before, we're going to find the one responsible for what happened in Pendrago _together_ and deal with them.”

Dezel sighed again, then fell silent, doing nothing to fight Rose as she removed his boots one after the other and set them aside. His hands did grip the chair armrests a fraction tighter as she stood up and took his hat, however, setting it on the small, nearby table.

“Get your gloves, jacket, and shirt off,” she ordered as she moved to remove her bolero and set it aside. “I bet you're all bruised up underneath.”

“If I agree to eat a gel, will you just let me sit here until you go to bed?”

“No.”

“What good is checking my injuries going to do? You can't use healing magic!”

“I want to see what they look like before you have any gels, that way I can compare how you look in the morning,” Rose explained with rapidly thinning patience as she walked back over. “Now, c'mon! Jacket, gloves, and shirt off!”

For a moment, Dezel didn't move, though his reddening cheeks said more than any words or actions ever could. He was embarrassed. Maybe even a little bashful. Even if he wasn't being such a bastard about all this, it might even be rather endearing. Slowly, he pulled his gloves off and handed them over. As Rose set them aside with his hat, Dezel shed his jacket. He hesitated as he came down to his shirt, then finally pulled it up and over his head, wincing as he did so. Underneath were a few large bruises, scattered over his chest and sides, already turning from an irritated red to an angry purple in color.

“Just a few bruises,” Dezel muttered as Rose confiscated his shirt. “No big deal.”

“You look like you got thrown into the ground a couple of times. How is that not a big deal?”

“It just managed to catch me a couple of times with those big wings. That's all. Stop worrying about it.”

Rose shook her head. “No, you do need those gels. And a warm bath. That'll make you feel better.”

“A–a what?!” Dezel stammered, his sullen expression evaporating into one of alarm as he sat bolt upright, bruises be damned. “I don't need a bath! Give me back my shirt!”

A small smirk tugged at the corners of Rose's mouth and she turned away to head for the door. “Yes, you do. Now stay here while I let the innkeeper know we need the tub filled.”

“I–I'm not–! I won't–!”

“Stay or I won't let you back into my body later!”

Defeated, Dezel sank back into the chair again. Though he said nothing to confirm he'd stay put, Rose figured by the expression on his blush tinted face that he wasn't going anywhere. Better for them both, really, since the lack of continued arguing meant something could finally get done about the current situation.

* * *

Dezel stood weakly before the bathtub, face a mask of disapproval. Rose stood just behind him and to the left, her hands on her hips, watching with a frown of her own.

“No,” he finally said without turning to face her. “I'm not getting in.”

“And why not? Do you know how much extra got added to my inn room bill for this?” Rose asked, allowing a dangerous edge to creep into her voice. More than anyone, Dezel should know how much she hated wasting gald. “You _need_ to get cleaned up and soak for a little bit.”

“I'll go clean up somewhere else, then.”

The corner of Rose's mouth twitched. “Where? The nearest pond or stream? You look like you'd make it all of five steps out the door before falling over.”

“I'm not taking my pants off in front of you!” he growled back, finally turning just enough to face her at an angle.

Oh, so that was the problem, was it? Rose couldn't help but smirk briefly before she carefully schooled her expression back into one of irritation. “Stop being such a child about all this. Do you need me to turn around until you're naked and in the tub?”

Dezel said nothing, glancing away and rubbing one forearm with his other hand. He was fidgeting. Something Rose had noticed he did when he was worked up about something, though usually, he tended to mess with his hat instead. Deprived of his beloved headpiece, he needed something else to do with his hands, apparently.

“Well?” Rose questioned, tapping her foot against the floor in a more notable display of impatience. One she hoped would get Dezel's attention.

“Fine,” he spat after another moment of grudging silence. “Whatever. Just...turn around already so I can strip and get in.”

After a nod of approval, Rose turned on one heel and faced the other direction, folding her arms across her chest. Behind her, she could hear the sound of belt buckles being undone, following by the sound of leather and metal clanking against the floor as they were gently tossed aside. Dezel muttered something under his breath as he unhitched his pants and pulled them down, discarding them in a similar fashion. A little more movement came after, in which Rose assumed Dezel was taking off his undergarments, then the sound of a little minimal splashing as he climbed into the tub.

“I'm in the tub,” he grumbled sullenly. “Happy now?”

“'Happy' is pushing it,” Rose replied as she turned back around, “But I suppose 'satisfied' will do.”

Well, sort of, anyway. She had to frown at the sight of Dezel positioned as he was in the tub, curled in on himself with his knees drawn up to his chest from the look of it. Like he was trying to appear smaller while keeping certain...aspects...of himself hidden. Rose sighed and shook her head.

“You realize I've seen naked men before, right? I know what a man's private parts look like.”

Dezel stared at her, blind eyes wide behind his shaggy bangs, his face red as a cherry. “You–that doesn't mean–! _I don't want to show you mine!_ ”

Rose couldn't help it. She laughed, her own face taking on a bit of a pinkish glow. “I never said you had to! You're just being so damn bashful about all this! Especially considering you've probably seen _me_ without clothes on before.”

Suddenly quite unable to speak, Dezel turned even redder in the face – if it were at all possible – and sank down into the water until it was just below his nose. All too amused by her guardian's embarrassment, Rose shook her head and walked over to where a bar of soap and a washcloth sat by the basin on the dresser. Picking both up, she offered them to her companion.

“Here, so you can scrub up a little. If you want, I'll even go look over my ledgers on the other side of the room with my back to you so you can have a bit of privacy.”

Dezel said nothing, though Rose could feel the air stirring around her hands with their offerings as he examined what she'd brought. After a moment, he curled in on himself a little tighter.

“C'mon, Dezel,” Rose coaxed, suddenly feeling a pang of guilt over how miserable he looked. “You'll feel better if you wash up some.”

He scowled, but the fierce expression didn't stick for more than a moment. Then he was glancing away, his voice small when he finally spoke. “This is mortifying. I barely have the energy to argue with you. Why are you doing this to me?”

For a split second, Rose felt her temper spike...but then it was pooling back down into guilt and sympathy. She really shouldn't have found any amusement in Dezel's discomfort or feelings of vulnerability. Somehow, this had turned into a punishment rather than a favor or an aid for his aching body. How long had it been since he'd exposed himself to anyone like this, if ever at all? When was the last time someone helped him with his wounds or offered to do much of anything for him, period?

“Dezel...” His name came out as a sigh. Rose set the soap and washcloth aside for the moment. “Listen, I'm not doing this to be mean to you or anything. I'm just...trying to help. Because you've always been there to help me and the others. You've taken pretty good care of us all over the years and now I'm just trying to take care of you.”

“I don't want you to have to do that...”

“But what if it's not something I consider an obligation? I definitely don't enjoy arguing with you, but helping you out when you need it... That's different. That's what family and friends do for each other. We've been over this already.”

Dezel said nothing, but Rose could see his adam's apple rising and falling as he swallowed, his mouth drawing into a thin, but slightly wavering line.

Rose sighed quietly and reached out from where she knelt by the side of the tub, brushing Dezel's bangs from his face. “It's been a long time, hasn't it? Since anyone else did anything for you that wasn't just a quick offering and a rushed little prayer?”

A slight nod. One that Rose was a little surprised to see. She'd half expected an angry, flustered retort, but she supposed that between the earlier battle and all the grief she'd given him, Dezel was too worn down to keep all his usual barriers in place.

“I didn't want to remember what it was like,” he finally said quietly, in a whisper so soft Rose nearly missed it. “Because that also means remembering what it's like when that goes away. And it always does.”

“Dezel...”

The pain was all too clear in his clouded eyes. Rose felt her chest growing tight and she couldn't help but touch his cheek, only to have him pull away from her.

“Please stop touching me...” His voice was wavering. “Please just forget me and block your resonance again. I can't do this again, I can't...”

Some part of Rose wanted to slap some sense into him, to tell him to stop whimpering and toughen up. But another part of her remembered what it was like to discover that Brad had been taken from her. Remembered that day when she knew she'd never feel his rough hand on her shoulder or head again. It had been crushing to know that someone who had dedicated so much of his time and love to raising and caring for her was gone. To think that Dezel not only went through the same in losing Lafarga but that he had lost the _only_ person who had been there for him, to offer him a friendly, guiding touch... It was too upsetting.

“Is that what you really want?” she asked quietly, her hand still held out to him. “I'll leave you alone if that's what you really want, but is it...?”

“I...”

“Dezel...”

She set her hand against his cheek, cupping it carefully. His eyes closed, his mouth pulling into a pained grimace. Then he was setting one wet hand against hers holding it in place.

“I won't want you to stop, do you understand?” He was trying not to choke on the words. “I'm a greedy, sorry excuse for a seraph and I'll keep wanting and needing... I'll take and take and take, over and over again...”

Rose managed a tiny, fond smile, her own hand trembling a little where he held it in place. The back of her throat felt tight. “You can't forcibly take what I'll be freely giving. Now let me take care of you, okay? And stop being so rough on yourself.”

He tightened his fingers over hers a moment, as though afraid to let go. That if he did, she would pull away and prove all his trust misplaced. But then he was lowering his hand, forcing himself to believe what he was hearing. In exchange for managing that small leap of faith, Rose let her hand linger a moment longer, brushing his cheek with the side of her thumb before withdrawing.

“I'm going to wash your hair, alright?” Getting to her feet again, Rose pulled the chair over to the side of the tub. “Just tilt your head back a little so I don't get soapy water in your eyes.”

“Okay...”

Once she was seated, Rose set her hands on the sides of Dezel's head and helped him ease back far enough that she could wet his hair down. She cupped bath water in her hands, dampening his silver and green tipped hair bit by bit until she ready to lather up some soap and work it in between the strands. As she massaged his scalp, she couldn't help but notice Dezel slowly unfurling himself little by little. The tension drained out of him, his shoulders slumping until she was sure his eyes had closed. Once in awhile, he'd make a small noise, barely discernible but one of definite ease and pleasure. Hardly the sorts of sounds Rose ever expected to hear from her grumpy guardian, but they were pleasing to hear, regardless. When she was through, Rose used a bucket to dip into the bathwater and rinse the soap out of Dezel's hair.

“Heh, you look a little like a shaggy, soaked sheepdog,” she couldn't help but chuckle when she was done. Picking up the soap, she handed it to him. “Here, so you can wash your face a little. Then I'll dry your hair before you get out.”

Dezel said nothing, apparently uncertain as to how to respond. His behavior was unusually shy and restrained, but Rose figured it was due in part to his fatigue. The rest was probably because he wasn't used to the attention but perhaps was afraid that one wrong move on his part might cause it to stop. Still, he took the soap and washed his face in silence, handing the bar back over when he was done.

“Here, I'll dry you off a little.” Picking up a towel, Rose beckoned him over to the side of the tub. “Just lean here for me, okay?”

Dezel nodded and scooted over to the side, resting his forearms on the edge of the tub. Rose used the towel to dab at his face a little before setting part of it over his head and rubbing him down to pull the excess water from his hair. There was another soft sound from Dezel as she worked, one that sounded like a half-swallowed moan. Unable to help a quiet giggle, Rose leaned in and hugged him to her, the towel draped down under his chin and wrapped around the back of his neck. Even from where she sat, she could see that her seraph's face had taken on a reddish tint, but he leaned against her regardless, clearly wanting.

For a moment, they remained as they were, comfortably quiet while Rose brushed Dezel's newly dried hair back with the fingertips of one hand. In a way, it felt so odd to have so much contact with him. What she supposed could be considered intimate contact, especially. He was usually so withdrawn, so stoic and gruff, Rose had wondered before if he had a softer side at all. But here it was, exposed as the rest of him.

Just as she was about to suggest Dezel get out of the tub and get dried off, Rose noticed that his breathing had slowed and deepened somewhat. Looking down at him, she noticed that his eyelids were fluttering a little, as though he was struggling to stay awake. Though his exhaustion had a lot to do with his current state, Rose found herself pleased that he was comfortable enough with her to come close to dozing off.

Though that pleased feeling quickly changed to one of surprise as Dezel stirred and lifted his head, pressing his lips to hers in a brief, soft kiss. Rose startled, causing Dezel to jerk his head a bit and his eyelids to fly open all the way. Realization dawned swiftly; he'd been half asleep and had probably kissed her without entirely realizing what he was doing. That hardly seemed a good enough excuse for Dezel, however, as he suddenly pushed the towel off himself and scooted back and away in the tub, putting as much distance between himself and Rose as possible.

“Sorry!” he blurted out, his voice cracking slightly. “Sorry, I... I was dozing off. I didn't realize...”

Rose touched two fingertips to her lips briefly, at a loss for words for once. Certainly, the kiss had been unexpected, but she couldn't say she disliked it, either. Hmm. It reminded her that it had been more than a month since her last one night stand, and far longer since anyone had kissed her and...well...really meant it. The thought left her wondering if there was anything behind what Dezel had just done or if he'd slipped down into a short dream where he believed he was kissing someone else.

“It's okay,” she finally said as she stood up to put the towel aside. “Listen, I'm gonna go out to the front desk and put in an order for another plate of food so you can have dinner. If you're up to it, maybe you can get dried off and dressed while I'm gone.”

“I don't really need anything to eat.”

Rose waved the response off with one hand. “Yeah, yeah, I know. Seraphim don't need food like humans do, but it'll probably help you feel better and give you the strength to recover. What's your preference? Pork and potatoes? Cheese risotto? Minestrone soup?”

“Pork and potatoes, since there's no use arguing.”

“Right. Oh, and you'll probably also need different clothes to change into until we can get yours cleaned up a bit.”

Dezel sputtered from the tub, suddenly indignant. “I don't need more clothes! The ones I have are fine!”

Rose frowned and picked up his jacket, eyeing the dirt smudged onto it before glancing Dezel's way again. “Don't be so stubborn! It'd just be for tonight. Then we can clean this and everything else in the morning.”

“You know you can't just pay someone else to do that, right? Or have someone else on crew handle it? They won't be able to see what I wear!”

“Then you can clean them yourself or I can do it for you,” Rose said confidently as she hung his jacket up on a hook by the door. “And before you protest that second idea, I know how to wash garments dependent on what they're made of. I'll handle your clothes like I'd handle a valued customer's merchandise.”

Dezel grunted but said nothing as he sank lower in the tub water again, apparently choosing to sulk again rather than respond.

“And now that that's all settled, I'm stepping out for a few minutes! If you get out of the tub, just wrap yourself up in some towels after you dry off and take a seat until I get back with some spare clothes.”

Figuring there would be no further protests at that point, much less grumpy commentary, Rose retrieved her jacket, left the room and shut the door behind her. Taking care of her guardian seraph was proving to be a bit frustrating, yet somehow weirdly fulfilling. She supposed it was because she was finally getting to do something for him of her own accord, rather than simply serving as his shield against malevolence.

Still, even as she walked to the inn front desk, the feeling of his warm lips against hers weighed on her mind. Perhaps she'd pester Dezel about that later...

* * *

When Rose returned to her inn room a short time later, dinner ordered and some spare clothing in hand, she found Dezel seated at the small table, a towel wrapped around his waist to keep his vulnerable parts covered and with a second towel draped around his shoulders. He still looked sullen, his blind gaze downcast as Rose entered the room and set the clothing she had been carrying on the table in front of him.

“Here. I snagged these from our inventory and wrote them off as spare use clothes for an emergency. Cheap and plain, but they'll do for right now,” she said as she began removing her boots. “Dinner should be here shortly and once it arrives, I'm going to wash up myself.”

“Bath water's probably cold by now, though,” Dezel warned, though his voice was flat and quiet. “It was already lukewarm by the time I got out.”

“You say that like I'm not used to washing up in cold streams and creeks. It's fine, Dezel.”

As Rose pulled her jacket and bandanna off and hung them up, there was a knock at the door. Answering it, she found an inn employee on the other side with a covered plate in one hand and a bottle in the other.

“The order you placed earlier, miss.”

“Thanks! And here's a couple of gald for your trouble.” Rose dug a few coins out of one pocket and handed them over as she accepted the food, then closed the door and walked Dezel's dinner over to the table. “Hope you don't mind, but I ordered a bottle of cider to go with your food. Figured you'd want something decent to wash it down with.”

As she took the cover from the plate, Rose noticed Dezel perk up a bit, the scent of perfectly roasted pork and potatoes enough to gain his attention. Come to think of it, Rose couldn't quite recall the last time she'd seen the wind seraph eat much of anything. He was a more than a capable cook, that much she knew for sure, but he seemed to shy away from eating in front of her or anyone else. Possibly because in the case of the latter, it would look like food was simply vanishing into thin air and cause a panic. That did make her wonder just how often he could and did indulge in food, especially since he did like it so much.

“Eat up while I wash up.” Walking over to the tub, Rose began to get the rest of her clothes off. “And no falling asleep at the table, mister!”

“Yeah, I won't,” came the low, grumbled response.

The bathwater was still mildly warm when Rose climbed into the tub, but she knew she wouldn't have long before it would be downright cold. It was a shame she couldn't enjoy herself more that way, but in this case, Dezel's comfort was more important. After all, he'd been the one who'd gotten knocked around by a hellion earlier. So she washed up fairly quickly, half keeping an eye on what Dezel was doing across the room while he ate with his back to her.

When he was through eating, Dezel got up and got dressed in the spare clothes Rose provided. As she could feel his breeze checking on her to likely see which way she was facing as he pulled the towels off, Rose couldn't help but smirk as she turned away in the tub. The loose-fitting tunic and pants she'd brought fit him well enough, though Dezel seemed a little at odds with the way his arms were exposed while dressed, as his usual shirt was long-sleeved. Then he was back in the chair again, his back to Rose while she got out and dried off.

“How do you feel?” she asked as she pulled on her undergarments and her nightgown.

“Alright, I guess.” A pause. Then, more quietly: “Thanks for the meal. It was good.”

Rose hummed in approval, then took a moment to dig around in the pack she'd brought with her. “You're welcome. Think you've got room for a gel?”

“Yeah. What kind?”

“Apple. It's all I've got with me at the moment.” Walking over, Rose popped a gel into Dezel's mouth before he could respond. He growled around it as he chewed, clearly irritated again, causing Rose to smirk as she left him and went to turn down the bed covers. “You're such a grouch about the littlest things sometimes. Who'd have thought a big, bad seraph could be such a baby?”

“Tch, I'm tired and sore, so I don't know what you expected. Anyway, if you're done harassing me, I want to finally get some actual rest.”

“I figured as much. That's why I'm getting the bed ready.”

Irritation vanished in the face of sudden surprise and anxiety. Dezel stared at her through unseeing eyes. “...what? I meant I was ready to rest in you as my vessel!”

“Is that what you really want, though?” Rose plopped down on the bed, sitting on the side of it. “You seemed like you were able to get pretty comfortable resting against me in the tub, so I figured you might sleep easier this way.”

“That...that was a mistake, one I made because I was so worn out. That's all.”

“Was the kiss really a mistake, too? Or was that something else?”

The color drained from Dezel's face. He tried to stammer out an answer, something about being half-asleep and being unaware of his surroundings, but Rose cut him off before he could get any further.

“Did you think I was someone else? Someone you were dreaming about?”

Silence. Dezel's hands balled into fists in his lap, so tight his knuckles turned white.

“You said earlier that you'd want to take and take when it came to contact, and I told you that you didn't have to force anything out of me if I was offering it freely. Maybe I'd like it if you stopped denying what you want when it's something so simple, something I've decided I like giving you,” Rose went on, watching him carefully. “You can curl up with me tonight and we can keep each other warm. Protect each other. You'd like that, wouldn't you?”

The color was returning to Dezel's face, though in the form of a deep, rosy blush. His balled up fists were trembling in his lap. “I...I'm not one of your flings. I don't want this if it's going to affect how things already are between us. If it affects my duty.”

“Come on, Dezel. I'm not trying to proposition you, for gods' sake.”

Again, no answer.

Rose frowned. “Do you _want_ me to proposition you?”

“Wh–what!? _No!_ Why would I?! I just said I don't want to be another one of your one night stands!” Getting to his feet, Dezel turned away, his arms folded tightly over his chest. “This isn't some game, Rose! I'm tired and I just want to sleep, that's all!”

“I just thought it'd be nice if you could do that next to me, falling asleep while I rub your neck or pet you more like I did earlier.” Getting up, Rose walked cautiously toward Dezel, stopping when she was just within arm's reach of him. “It's not a game to me, Dezel. It's me looking after you for once like I said earlier.”

“Why...?” His voice was wavering again. “I know you said it was because we're family and because you wanted a turn looking after me, but really, why else?”

Reaching out, Rose carefully took one of his hands in hers, causing him to turn a little. “Do I need another reason?”

He swallowed, his mouth a tight, but faintly trembling line of uncertainty. His fingers twitched in her hand, as though resisting the urge to close around it and accept her invitation. “...what if I said I'd like you to have another one?”

“What if I said I wanted you to kiss me again so I could kiss you back?” She let go of his hand and backed toward the bed. “Come on, Dezel. Seeing you like this is making my heart hurt and it's clear yours is hurting, too. Maybe that will stop if we have more time together.”

She climbed into bed and patted a section of the mattress beside her. Even from across the room, she could see the want in Dezel's expression. See his adam's apple rise and fall as he swallowed nervously. The air stirred around Rose, testing, asking, _pleading_ for the invitation to truly be a reality.

Then he was hesitantly making his way over, climbing into the bed from the other side. Rose reached out and caught his shoulder, tugging at him, immediately wanting him closer. And closer he got, wasting no time in cuddling up against her, wrapping an arm around her waist and burying his face against her chest. Her fingers found their way into his hair, threading through the two-toned strands and rubbing gently at his scalp. Dezel moaned and melted further against her and the mattress, the sound sending a pleasant, needy tingle through Rose's body. She realized then that she did want him, wanted to hear that lovely sound over and over again, but that she would have to be careful.

Dezel was not one to be casually played with. He wanted genuine affection. He wanted prolonged contact. He wanted to be cherished in a way he'd barely known for most of his life. Something Rose found herself wanting to provide as she brushed his bangs aside and kissed his forehead, earning a soft whine in return.

“I hate how weak you make me,” he breathed, voice breaking. “I never wanted you to know... But I'm so tired. I just want you to want to hang onto me like I want to hang onto you.”

It was enough to make Rose feel somewhat misty-eyed. She placed another soft kiss against his forehead and held him close. “And I will. I'll do that. I'll hang onto you more tightly than I've ever hung onto anyone. You might be a big grouch, but I'd have to be crazy to let go of someone like you.”

“Someone like me...” he repeated in a mumble, uncertain. “Rose, I'm not–“

She shushed him quietly. “You're not perfect, but you're one of the seraphim who's protected and guided us all since we were the Windriders. We've already lost so much and I don't want to lose anyone else. Besides, I like seeing this side of you, knowing you're not all prickly all the time. It's...kind of sweet, really.”

Dezel's cheeks flushed pink again, but he said nothing back, apparently at a loss for words. Yet, as she stroked his hair and carefully trailed her fingertips down the side of his neck, he caught her hand in his and kissed her palm. The sensation sent a small, tingling thrill through Rose and she couldn't help but smile.

“...can I kiss you again?” Dezel's silver eyes turned up in her direction, his winds playing gently over them both as he waited for her reaction.

Rose smiled. “I'd like it if you would.”

His touch was tentative as he lifted a hand to brush her cheek and then her neck as he pushed himself up enough to touch his lips to hers. The contact was soft and uncertain, and when Dezel lay back down again, Rose followed him to return the sentiment. The bit of added fervor in her kiss made him moan quietly, a sound that encouraged Rose to run a hand back through his hair and rub at the back of his neck. As she broke the kiss, he let out a sigh and relaxed against the pillow, what tension remaining in him ebbing away within the space of a few short breaths.

Rose pulled the covers up and Dezel's winds extinguished the candles. In the quiet, comfortable darkness that blanketed the room after, they cuddled beneath the bedsheets, Dezel's breath warm against Rose's skin through the gown where he rested his head. At his back, her hand moved lazily, tracing little circles through the fabric of his borrowed tunic.

“I want to wash your hair next time,” Dezel said sleepily. “Can I?”

“Mm, yeah.” Rose rested her head against his, nose buried in his hair to where she could smell the lavender-scented soap she'd used for him earlier. “I bet you'd be really good at giving me a nice massage at the same time, too, with those dexterous hands of yours.”

Dezel made a small sound of embarrassment, but nodded a little, anyway.

She kissed his head and the two of them went quiet, Dezel falling asleep first and Rose shortly after. The night passed, blissfully and without interruption.

* * *

Morning found Rose and Dezel eating breakfast together in their inn room, the latter between the two of them still operating in a shyer, much quieter manner than the former was used to most days. Still, Rose supposed the day before had given them both plenty to consider and it was their first morning rising together to greet the day.

Unfortunately, Dezel had awakened with a bit of a start around sunrise, jerking out of Rose's arms as he struggled to remember just what had happened the night before. Fortunately, however, it had not been difficult to gently urge him back down against the pillows again, Rose snuggling up against him and kissing his cheek to assure him that he hadn't dreamed everything up. They lay that way together for a short while as the first rays of sunlight filtered through the small inn room window, Dezel taking his turn at rubbing Rose's back while she practically purred against him in contentment.

“I figure you can keep the clothes I lent you last night, wear 'em while you get your other gear cleaned off,” Rose said after most of their empty plates had been taken away. She was nearly dressed, sitting on the side of the bed while she donned her boots. “Maybe they can be your bedclothes from now on, if not just a general spare set.”

“That...would be best,” Dezel admitted from where he still sat at the table. “I think my mana has fully seeped into them now, anyway; they're invisible as the rest of me.”

“Huh, funny, but I didn't even consider that happening when I gave them to you. Works out, though!”

“Yeah, I suppose.” He was silent a moment, brushing a hand down over his tunic where Rose had laid her head against him in bed earlier. Then: “So...is this how we are, now?”

Rose glanced up at him as she finished tying her boots on. “What do you mean?”

Dezel's cheeks took on a hint of pink. “You know what I mean! This... All of this.” He frowned and took a teacup that still remained on the table into his hands, gaze directed down at it as he turned it over in his fingers, needing something to fidget with. When he spoke again, his voice was quieter. “Actually sharing a room. And...a bed.”

Before Rose could answer, there was a tentative knock at the door. Dezel set the cup back on the table, lest whoever was on the other side get a glimpse of it seeming to float mid-air by itself. When Rose reached the door to answer it, she found Cale on the other side, the young man anxiously fidgeting a bit himself with a small parcel. He was only sixteen and a little on the small side for a sixteen-year-old at that. Rose figured he'd hit a growth spurt in a year or two and shoot up another few inches, but for the moment he was only a couple inches taller than her and a little on the lanky side. He had no family to speak of; yet another orphan taken into the Sparrowfeather fold when he was a teenager, given somewhere to go and something useful to do when no one else would have him.

“Ah, 'morning, Boss,” he began, the anxiety clear in his voice. He wasn't entirely able to look up at Rose, his brown-eyed gaze settled somewhere around her knees. “I, uh... I wanted to ask if you could do a favor for me?”

“Well, I guess that depends,” Rose replied, though her interest was piqued. “What's the favor?”

“After what happened yesterday, I... Well, I guess that was the first time since I joined the crew that I really _felt_ the presence of the seraphim. I've always believed in them, sure, and I took your word when I joined that the Sparrowfeathers are especially blessed. I've also seen a few things that I feel like only divine intervention could explain.”

At the table, Dezel snorted quietly. Rose suppressed an amused smirk.

“But uh, anyway,” Cale continued after a short, uncertain pause, though by that point he had lowered his voice so as not to be easily overheard by anyone who might be nearby, “Even as dangerous as our work can be at times, it's not every day a guy gets dumped out of a moving wagon by some...unseen force and only comes away with minor injuries. That feeling of being picked up by the wind and sent back to the wagons... I guess it was kind of a spiritual experience for me.”

Rose desperately wanted to glance over her shoulder to see just how red in the face their guardian seraph had become, but she didn't risk it. Instead, she waved Cale into the room and shut the door behind him, just to make sure no one would interrupt them. “I think I know what you're getting at. That special kind of divine intervention doesn't happen to everyone, after all. So what's all that got to do with the favor you want done?”

Cale didn't respond right away, but rather glanced at the parcel in his hands before looking up at Rose again. “I've heard the others say you have sort of a special connection to the seraphim that watch over us. If that's true, I was wondering if you could put out this offering where it might do the most good?” He held out the package. “They're palmiers. They're really good! The people here say they're the best in town. And I know offerings of food are what the others sometimes put out at the small shrines we pass once in a while on the road, so...”

He trailed off, waiting for Rose to hopefully relieve him of the parcel. Rather than take the offering, however, Rose stood pondering the situation and weighing her options. She tapped one index finger thoughtfully against her cheek. Then: “I mean, I could, but offerings are usually best given by the person actually making the offering, you know. It means more that way.”

“Oh. Uh, right. So where would be the best place to leave it? I don't want there to be any confusion between our seraphim and the ones watching over Marlind.”

At that point, Rose finally did look back at Dezel, the look of consideration in her eyes causing him to sit upright in sudden discomfort.

“Rose, don't you dare–!” Dezel hissed, but Rose was already turning back to Cale, who was starting to look more than a little confused by everything.

“You could just leave it here,” Rose said with a knowing smile. “You could say a prayer here to go with it, too! Our resident protective seraph is in the room with us, after all, so I'm sure he'd be fine with that.”

Dezel groaned and slumped in his chair. Cale stared at Rose, trying to work out whether or not she was joking.

“You...you can tell?” Cale stammered out, eyes darting about before he realized that the seraph must be somewhere behind his boss. “How do you–I mean...where...where is it? Er, he? Or she?”

“Our seraph is a he,” Rose said, her smile still in place and, if anything, hedging on mildly amused. Moving alongside Cale, she set a hand on his shoulder and turned him a little to face the chairs and table. “He's there, at the table. He usually comes to check on me every morning before going to check on the rest of you.”

The kid was shaking, so much he nearly dropped the parcel. Rose squeezed his shoulder to steady him. Dezel, meanwhile, looked nearly as uncomfortable as Cale.

“You...you're completely serious, aren't you?” Cale stole a glance at Rose, then set his gaze on the nearest chair, the one that was still somewhat pushed out from the table. “And I've been babbling on all this time like a fool...”

“Hey now, calm down!” Rose stepped forward and urged Cale to move with her. “He's used to hearing us talk about him all the time, so you don't have to feel embarrassed. It's not like he's going to strike you down either, especially not after the trouble he went through to save you. Just go set the palmiers on the table near that teacup.”

Slowly, carefully, Cale came within a few feet of the chair. He dared not look at it, rather keeping his focus on the table and then the teacup. With trembling hands, he set the parcel beside it, then took a step back. Dezel, his fists balled in his lap, glanced in the direction of the parcel but made no attempt to reach for it.

“Rose, what the hell,” he managed between clenched teeth. “We shouldn't be doing this!”

Before the wind seraph could say anything else, however, Cale dropped to his knees and clasped his hands before himself as though he was about to start praying. Dezel glanced away, too embarrassed to even set his blind gaze on the kid.

“Oh, mighty seraph, protector of the Sparrowfeathers,” Cale began shakily, “Please accept this humble offering, even though it in no way is a suitable repayment for the mercy you showed me yesterday.”

“Mn,” Rose hummed quietly, the sound a sure warning that she was about to make things worse. “If you want, you can address him as Lord Dezel.”

“ _Rose!_ ” There was no mistaking the warning in Dezel's tone. He looked like he was about ready to flee the room on the wind. “I don't want to be called that! It's...it's... It's too damn formal and it sounds idiotic!”

That was it, the final straw. Rose couldn't help it – she started giggling quietly. Cale looked to her in alarm.

“B-Boss?”

“It's alright! He's just being kind of stubborn about all this,” Rose reassured him gently. “He's very...particular. Doesn't want to be addressed as 'Lord' because it's too formal, so 'Seraph Dezel' should be fine.”

Cale swallowed hard and turned his attention back to the chair. A few sparse words came out as he tried to add more onto his prayer, but nothing all that coherent. After a moment, Rose walked over and knelt beside him, placing one hand on his shoulder again.

“Relax and take a breath, Cale. Between you and me, our seraph isn't really much for formalities on the whole and even though all this prayer and offering stuff is helpful to him, he's also...pretty bashful.”

Cale turned wide eyes toward her. “They...the seraphim...they can be that way?”

Rose nodded. “They can feel emotions, so yeah. And the truth is that Seraph Dezel isn't used to getting a whole lot of attention, even though he's been with us for a long time. So...just talk to him like you would a fellow Sparrowfeather. Just be respectful. And if you make offerings to other seraphim at any point, stick to being more formal. Dezel's...family. So he's an exception, just for us.”

“Family...” Cale repeated, and Rose swore his eyes looked a bit glassy. Slowly, he got to his feet. “Alright, I think I understand...”

Meanwhile, Dezel had gone as still as a statue. The air in the room, however, was starting to circulate a little erratically as he focused all his attention on trying to read it, as though he might need to know the exact moment to flee the scene.

“Seraph Dezel,” Cale began again, this time with a little less shaking than before, his voice softer and a tad more even. “I'm sorry if I came across like a fool. I've never been before a seraph before. Or been so directly helped by one. Thank you so much for everything you did to keep me safe and for all you do to help everyone else, too. It's very gracious  
of you to stay with us and protect us. An honor, for sure.”

At first, Dezel appeared to be resistant to even that approach, but the longer Cale talked, the more he seemed to relax until his hands uncurled in his lap. When the youngster stopped speaking, Dezel sat in silence for a few seconds before saying quietly, “Tell him 'you're welcome' for me, Rose.”

Rose nodded. “He says 'you're welcome'. Not a seraph of many words, but he means it.”

Cale managed a brief, but watery smile. He then glanced from Rose to the chair, then back at Rose again. “If I can say something else before I go...?”

Dezel sighed and nodded. Rose waved Cale onward, though he hesitated before continuing, suddenly anxious again.

“I also wanted to say that I'm honored to be a part of this family. It's obviously very special and I...I haven't had anyone to really call family since I was fourteen. I've only been here for a few months, but I'm so happy with the Sparrowfeathers. To be so readily accepted.” His voice was wavering. Suddenly, he bowed a little bit, eyes closing. “Thank you for accepting me, Seraph Dezel. It means everything to me!”

Briefly, Rose had to wonder if their guardian seraph would finally take such an emotional admission to be his cue to exit, post-haste. It seemed the kind of mushy rambling that would make him highly uncomfortable, annoyed, or perhaps both. So when Dezel stood up out of the chair and set a hand Cale's head, over his mop of scruffy black hair, and Rose couldn't help but stare a little. Beneath Dezel's touch, Cale was rooted to the spot, too afraid to move as the air swirled about him.

“Tell him he won't ever be without family again,” Dezel said softly. “And that I do accept him. And that I'm thankful for him.”

When Rose relayed the message, Cale lost his grip on his composure and began crying openly. Uncomfortable again, Dezel stepped back and moved off toward the bed, back turned with his arms folded across his chest. That was when Rose stepped in once more and offered Cale a handkerchief before walking him to the door.

“I'm so sorry,” he half-whimpered as Rose set a hand on the doorknob, his own hands occupied with the handkerchief as he wiped his eyes. “I just didn't expect...”

“To be fair, I didn't entirely expect what happened either,” Rose admitted with a small, but fond smile. “He's a very good seraph though, isn't he?”

“Yeah, I'm so happy he's with us. Thank you, Boss.”

When the door had finally swung shut again, Cale on his way out of the inn with somewhat blurry vision that would likely be a bit of an issue on and off for part of the day, Rose let out a heavy sigh. Leaning back against the door, she folded her own arms over her chest and looked across the room to Dezel, who still had his back to her.

“That was really good of you, you know,” she finally after a few moments, pushing away from the door to walk over. “Even if it was pretty unexpected.”

“He's a kid,” Dezel replied quietly without turning. “And I can't say I don't know the feeling.”

Setting a hand on one of his arms, Rose peered around at him from one side. “Though you do realize that this is even more reason to let me help you out though, right? Can't have our only seraph and such a good big brother to such a good kid get put out of commission at any point.”

Dezel hummed quietly and then shrugged. “Suppose not. But you never did answer my question from before.”

“Question? What was it again?”

“If this is what we are now.” He turned to sit down on the edge of the bed, gaze on Rose. “All of this bed and meal and bath sharing. You helping me is one thing, but all of that is something else.”

“True...” Moving up between Dezel's knees, Rose put her arms around his neck and leaned against him. After only a brief hesitation, he put his arms around her. “I guess it is! What would you call it?”

Dezel huffed softly. “As if I'd know. You humans have so many complicated levels of relationships and different names for them all.”

“True also. But this does seem more intimate that just friendship, I'd say. But I think I'd feel weird calling you my seraph boyfriend, too.”

“Tch, it'd feel weird being called that.”

“Maybe it's more like...a partnership,” Rose said thoughtfully, her fingers already rubbing lightly at the base of his neck. “The kind where we can take some time to feel things out. Where I've got your back and you've got mine, but instead of being just allies or friends, there's a lot of kissing and snuggling going on behind closed doors. ...and maybe more, if you'd like that, too.”

Dezel blushed, at a loss for words for a moment before he found his voice again. “I...y-yeah. If you're sure.”

“I do remember what you said last night, you know. About you not being one of my flings. But most of my one-night-stands never stay the whole night, and it's nice sharing a bed with someone I trust and can wake up next to in the morning.”

“I liked it, too,” Dezel admitted quietly as he leaned against her. “It was...comfortable.”

Rose had to smile as she let her fingers slip between the strands of hair on the back of his head, massaging at his scalp. Dezel hugged her a little closer and sighed quietly in contentment. It left Rose wondering if by “comfortable”, he'd really meant “comforting.” Dezel wasn't the sort to talk much about that sort of thing, likely because it'd make him seem vulnerable. But she was learning to read him with greater ease and the last twelve or so hours had told her quite a bit about her doting seraph guardian. He was sweeter than he let on, she thought. More gentle than she'd imagined. It made her eager to peel back his layers and discover him further as a person, not just as a teammate and a protector. Not just as a deity to be satisfied with only offerings and prayers.

“Rose?” Dezel was looking up at her again, his unseeing eyes unusually soft and sincere. “There's something I want to tell you before we do anything else.”

Rose's eyebrows arched a little. “Oh yeah? What's that?”

“I want to formalize my pact with you.”

“What do you mean?”

“A solid, proper pact should be a formal one. Agreed upon by both parties. Ours has never been that way because you didn't know about it from the start.” He let his gaze slip lower, off to the side in what Rose imagined was regret. “But I want to fix that if you're alright with it.”

“You'll have to tell me how, if there's anything I need to do, but...” There, she paused and placed a hand on his cheek to make him look back up at her again. “I'd like that.”

“We can do it later tonight, then, if you want. It might make you feel tired, so it'll be best done before bed.”

“Alright. We'll call it a date, then!”

Dezel smiled a little, though his expression softened again a moment after. “There is one part of it I do want to do now, though.”

“Oh?”

“I want to tell you my true name.”

“Your...true name? You mean Dezel isn't your real one?” Rose couldn't help but tilt her head a little in confusion. This must be some weird seraphim thing she hadn't been aware of before.

“It's what I want others to call me. It's...a safe name,” he explained carefully. “Seraphim are different than humans in that our true names have real power. They can be used to forge pacts and, in the old days, several hundred years ago, they used to allow humans to enslave us. Lafarga used to tell me stories about that time, back when more of humanity was resonant. So we have to be careful who we allow to have that information.”

Said information prompted a whole lot of questions, but Rose held her tongue in that regard for the time being. What mattered then was that Dezel had something deeply important he wanted to share with her and her alone. It felt more than private. Almost _intimate._

She nodded. “Okay, I think I understand.” A beat, then she couldn't help but smile teasingly. “Does this mean I can use it for you when we're messing around in bed?”

“ _Rose!_ ” All at once, Dezel was red in the face again, eyes wide. She'd never seen him so flustered and she had to laugh, and...after a second, he did a little as well before shaking it off. “I...you could, I...suppose. Just keep it to yourself, otherwise. Do you promise to do that for me?”

“Yeah, I do. I don't want anyone taking you away from me, after all.” She punctuated the statement with a soft kiss, one she placed against his forehead.

His smile broadened and she swore it was the happiest she'd seen him, yet. It made her heart flutter in her chest and she found she had to resist the urge to kiss him again if just so he could speak.

“It's _Lukeim Yurlin_ ,” he said. “It means 'Dezel with Unclouded Eyes'.”

Rose couldn't help but blink a couple of times in surprise. Before she could stop herself, she blurted out, “Unclouded eyes? That's kind of weirdly ironic, isn't it?”

Dezel's smile faded into something more somber and Rose immediately regretted her blunt observation. “Yeah, I suppose it is. It fit better before I went blind, obviously.”

Rose hummed softly in understanding, though she wasn't about to let the moment remain ruined. She brushed Dezel's bangs back from his face, tucking some of the soft strands behind an ear. The furrow in Dezel's brow softened a little more with every touch until she couldn't help but caress his cheek.

“Clouded or not, you still have beautiful eyes,” she ventured and was pleased to see his blind gaze flick up to her again. “ _Lukeim Yurlin_... It has a nice ring to it. It makes me wish I had a true name to give to you, too.”

Dezel's blush deepened. “Humans usually don't, but even if you did...”

“The way you're acting, I'd think it'd be like exchanging wedding vows or something.” She couldn't help but laugh a little, though the look of discomfort creeping into Dezel's expression caused her amusement to dry up rather quickly. “Wait, that isn't what it's actually like, is it?”

“Not...entirely, from what I know of human marriage. But it's still considered a very intimate act.”

“Oh...”

Less about vows, more about keeping each other's most important secret, Rose supposed. In the silence between them, she took a moment to gaze into Dezel's eyes again, more aware than ever of how expressive they were despite their lack of sight. There was something there this time as well, something...indistinct, but still vaguely readable. A need for her to trust him, she thought, in the same way he had just placed all of his trust in her. When she really thought about it, giving her his true name was a very bold step for someone who had, a number of times before, used her body without her prior knowledge. Then again, for her to decide to take him to bed, to even have him as her lover and partner, was also a bold step on her part. They were sharing, learning, inviting each other into each other's lives, and a good partnership was a balanced one, she knew.

“If I did have a true name,” she said thoughtfully as she broke the silence, “I would give it to you as you gave me yours. I think it would be important since we're going to be partners...and partners share all things evenly.”

“Rose...”

He hugged her closer, face pressed against her chest. She could feel his fingers curling against the back of her tunic, all the neediness he couldn't put into words communicated in how he grasped at her. He was hers, Rose realized. Dezel had truly given himself to her. This was where he wanted to be, perhaps where he'd wanted to be for a long while. And though being in her arms was likely somewhere he thought he'd never be welcome, she had no intention of letting him go now that she had him; Rose had meant was she said the night before, after all. Dezel was something special, someone precious, who just wanted to be touched and accepted and loved. He was more human than Rose ever thought a seraph could be, but she decided she loved that about him.

“We have chores to do,” Dezel sighed heavily after a moment, yet did nothing to remove his arms from around her waist, his head still resting against her chest.

“Yeah, we do,” Rose agreed as she lifted a hand to stroke the back of his neck again, voice as soft as each gentle touch to his bare skin. “But I think they can wait a few more minutes. Especially since that's not nearly as long as the time we have to make up for.”

He smiled and hugged her a little tighter. “Thank you, Rose.”

She kissed the top of his head and rested her chin there, a smile of contentment curving her own lips. “No, thank you, my _Lukeim Yurlin_.”


End file.
